temptation

It is so easy to be tempted to be short tempered with people when you are sick. I need time to myself but I can't get away from my responsibilities to my daughter. So I am just suffering through this. She seems happy enough, playing and babbling to herself. You can tell she's sick because she is acting a little goofy and keeps trying to crawl all over me. I can't wait until I am better again!!!!

still sick; being a sick mom of a sick kid; discriminated against

Now my daughter has my cold, and I'm still feeling pretty bad. So this is a tough situation. I guess moms have to deal with this all the time. But it still seems to me to be an outrageous indignity. How can a person be Florence Nightingale when they feel like Phyllis Diller? I need a shower but I can't seem to make myself do it. I feel so chilly even though I'm running the heater. I wonder if that means I have a flu? I don't think I have a fever but I might have a low grade one. Need to find the thermometer. Hah. I must be delirious because I just noticed that the word "mom" is in thermometer.

You know you are sick when you don't feel like drinking good coffee! I think it's weird how kids don't get as sick as their parents do from the same cold or flu. My daughter is getting on my nerves with wanting to play. But her nose is running and she woke up a few times last night crying, so I know she's sick.

So I have officially been discriminated against. I was inquiring about renting a duplex and I was told that the manager doesn't rent to people who have kids. According to the Fair Housing Act in California, it's totally illegal to discriminate against people with kids. I was thinking of reporting the landlord but it's a tricky situation because I didn't technically hear that from him. I heard it from the current tenant who is trying to arrange for someone to take over his lease because he wants to leave early. I can't seem to get him to put me in touch with the landlord unless I make a big deal about it. He's sort of, how do you say, "gently" discouraging me from looking to rent the place by saying how small the place is, and how the manager doesn't rent to people with kids. My husband mentioned to him that it's unlawful to say that. But I think the vibe I am getting is that this guy is desperate to not have to pay rent next month, so he is looking for someone who could move in quickly (and who the landlord would approve of). I guess that what i learned is: I know what it feels like to be discriminated against and denied some necessary service.

Sick today, and a Project-Along

I seem to have a cold which I am distressed about. I hate getting sick and it always seems to happen at the most inconvenient times. I had so much fun yesterday and I feel this strong urge to get out and have more interesting experiences. I have been so reclusive for so long. But my health is telling me to slow down and be content to just take care of my family. I need to spend some time in prayer. There are so many people who are hurting or seem to need help. I will pray today and be glad for the kindness that the Lord has shown me in so many ways.

I am going to participate in a "Project-along" with some people on a mailing list called "Christian Artisans". That should be fun. The purpose is to make something for yourself. I never make anything for myself because everyone always wants everything I make. I will have to think about what to make. I was going to work on my afghan for this, but then I remembered that I am making it for my husband. There really isn't anything that I want that is crocheted or knitted. I kinda want to make some crocheted flowers to make something decorative to hang over the doorway to my kitchen. Perhaps I should work on this and figure out how to make it work. (I think I might need to use wire to keep the flowers and vines oriented the way I want?)

I guess this is a good enough idea. I don't need a scarf, hat, shawl, or anything else. I don't really know how to make a sweater, nor do i have the money. But scrap yarn is readily available to make flowers. So that will be the plan. For now, I guess!

a fun day, first day of parenting class

Today was so much fun. I've got that happy and tired feeling. Feet are aching but my soul is satisfied. This morning I went to our very first mommy and me class. It was so neat. I just love it. How much fun to see your child having fun with other kids. Then this afternoon, a couple friends came over and we had a nice time together. One of them is a new Mary Kay "Independent Beauty Consultant" and so we did her very first Mary Kay party, just the 3 of us. That was different. I'm not used to fussing with my appearance with other people watching. We laughed a lot though so it was cool. I didn't buy anything although perhaps I should have. Instead I just let my friend get all the cool free stuff because she was the hostess.

Now I get to relax and crochet. I'm trying to finish a large, queen-sized afghan that I have been working on forever. It's taking more time than I thought.

I was able to stop at Michaels craft store today and purchase a set of Susan Bates crochet hooks. I decided that I just had to have them because I'm so tired of my Boye hooks snagging the yarn as I'm working stitches. I was having a big problem when working with pompadour yarn for some baby items. I also picked up a few skeins of RH Supersaver to put a fancy edging on my queen-sized afghan. And I also could not resist buying a set of heart-shaped cookie cutters. I want to make some cookies as gifts this Valentine's Day. Corny but sweet. I want to find a spicy gingerbread recipe or something unusual. Although I have a Williams Sonoma recipe for Raspberry Linzer Hearts which are really amazing looking cookies. Perhaps I will make them.

Update on my puzzling life

There are so many things going on right now in my life. It's just a big puzzle that I can't seem to ever see where it is going. But I know that God is in control, so I have peace. I should mention that my friend and I ended up talking and worked out our problems. We agreed to unity in the Lord, and we are going to start going to a mommy and me group on Mondays. That's nice. I am so glad that it could be positive.

My mother-in-law was in the hospital recently but she is home now. And the doctors say it was just a problem with taking too many medications. So I am glad and hope that there is nothing else wrong. But that was scary!

My mom might retire from her job, and so that has my side of the family preoccupied. It's a big move on her part as she is so dedicated to her job. But she is going to 70 years old soon so I feel it's the best thing for her.

I was researching a gluten-free diet for my friend (because she thinks her daughter has a wheat allergy). And I kept running across descriptions of something called celiac disease which is a serious allergy to gluten in grains. All of a sudden I realized that perhaps my grandmother, who is norwegian, might have celiac disease. She has all the symptoms, and it appears that people from Northern Europe have higher rates of carrying this disease because it is passed genetically. Then I started to think that me and my dad have it too because we have a lot of the symptoms too. So that's started me thinking I must see my doctor and get the blood test for it. Oh dear. All I need...another health concern!

Right now I am really pushing myself to de-clutter some areas in my house that my husband has repeatedly complained about. I am going to solve some of my stash problems by finishing up old projects and actually utilizing them. For instance, I have 4 giant granny square afghans that I intend to join together so that they will be a cover for my queen-sized bed. I have been meaning to do this for a long time but procrastinated. So that has just been sitting in a trashbag and adding to the clutter problem in the bedroom. I will finish that up over the next 2 days and then I get to feel good and proud of my work.

I told my husband recently that I feel like our home is like one of those puzzles where all the pieces are attached to the board, and there is only one space so that you can slide the pieces around to rearrange and solve the puzzle. It's not a flattering image, but that is basically what we are dealing with because for economic reasons, we are forced to live in a 1 bedroom apartment. Between our things and the baby's things, we barely have room for everything. But I am determined to keep shifting things around and also to donate/toss until we have a better more harmonious arrangement.

We have lived in this apartment for more than 2 years, and we have never hung up our framed pictures and things! All the frames and junk that should be on the walls is propped up against a wall in the bedroom. This is a typical thing with us. So I am determined to either hang up things our throw them away.

I thought I would mention that recently, I joined a bunch of yahoo groups for knitting and crochet. But then I was disturbed to see that on this one knitting list, they made it a rule that you could not mention your faith. I hate that sort of thing. I know that I should consider it a blessing when people persecute me, but it always seems like this sort of thing is in the grey area of not being true persecution...but just bigotry or something annoying like that. So then I searched and found a few Christian crafting groups. I have joined them. I guess I'll just quit out of the secular lists. I am just tired of feeling like I have to avoid mentioning my faith for fear of offending people. I don't want to be totally obnoxious about faith because I don't feel that it is good if faith is not shared out of love. But on the other hand, I don't want to compartmentalize my life so that my online life is devoid of Christ. I am trying to walk with Jesus, and that includes my writing. Online stuff is all writing. It's words you put in to print. It should reflect the core of who you are. And I am in Christ. So that's my decision. I know it is a good one. Perhaps I will only quit the knitting group that has made that unfair rule.

Today I am home with my daughter. I am working on the Crocheted Nappy Cake.

Now we are to dance!!!

Since today is an "I don't care" day, I thought I might talk about something completely meaningless in the grander scheme of life. What I am talking about is "casual gaming": PC games made by Popcap games (there are other companies too). I really like the games Zuma and Bejewelled 2, but so far, I have managed to avoid buying the games and just play the free versions online. My husband keeps a pretty tight reign on me when it comes to buying games and shopping online. But I think I am at the point where I want to buy Zuma. It's so addicting. I know I'll get frustrated with the higher levels. Perhaps it has been a blessing that I only play the free online mode, so that I just keep getting sent back to the beginning to play the lower levels again. I read some conversations online about Zuma that made me laugh because people get so heavily involved in this game to the point of feeling that their lives are being wasted by it. Here are a couple of the funnier comments (but I have a weird sense of humor):

Zuma addict said: "Does this game ever end. I have decided to go to a 1000 and if it doesn’t end, I am going to delete it from my computer…it’s the only way to return to my normal life…"

then later Zuma addict says: "now I am up to level 1603 with over a billion points and nothing….I said i would play to 1000 and then it was i will play to a billion points and now….i don’t know..i need to delete it!! IT seems to me to have no end!"

And that's all there is from Zuma addict. I wonder, is he/she still out there with all the little balls rolling around endlessly?

Perhaps they never heard:

"Excellent work, mighty frog one! You obtained your lawful place of the stars, at the side of the ancient ruler of the Zuma. In the future, as for me, you are known as our sibling. I will call you brother, and we control the outer space together! It is joyous news! Now we are to the dance!"

(Words from final screen of Zuma)

I should stay far far far away from Zuma. But I am seriously thinking of buying it from amazon. I think it's only like 10 dollars.

crocheting for a new baby today

Today I am making the cutest little crocheted baby booties. They are the mary jane booties from Carolyn Christmas' "Crochet Precious Baby Booties" pattern booklet. I'm using Patons Brilliant yarn in the shade radiant red (although it seems like maybe that color is no longer being made?). It's a pretty color but now that I have time to look at it in the sunlight, it appears to be more of an orange undertone red, rather than a true ruby red. I wanted to use it because I thought it might look like Dorothy's sparkly red slippers. It's a little too orange-y. But it still looks super cute. I'm sure to finish them soon because the pattern works up so fast. Then I'll try to start making the crocheted items for the "Crochet Nappy Cake" I'm making. This is all for my sister-in-law's baby shower which should be sometime in the next few months. I haven't received an invitation yet so I really don't know how much time that I have. I bought 2 sacks of yarn yesterday. Cost almost $50 so far. I still have to buy diapers and small items to tuck in to the diapers for extra little surprises. If you would like to read more about how to make a diaper cake, you can google it!

It's a mad mad world. It really is. I can't even believe all the crazy things that have happened lately. Hmmm. Time to just pray and crochet.

a falling out, and a fresh plan for the day

What a way to start a day! I got in an argument with a friend on the phone this morning. There had been some tension for awhile due to some things that were annoying me for the longest time. I think that perhaps my friend was feeling extra emotional and stressed (perhaps because of things I said previously as well as the real life problems she is experiencing). So she kinda snapped at me, and I took the bait and told her that I have a problem with her. She ended up hanging up on me because she just refused to talk with me or listen to what I had to say (granted, I was complaining about her attitude). So now I have this feeling like I don't want to be her friend anymore. I feel like we can't have an honest and mutually respectful relationship. I find the temptation too great to resist for seeing faults in her attitude and behavior. I wish I could just be more saintly and just accept her as she is. But I find myself not wanting to talk with her anymore unless she apologizes and is willing to have an honest and rational discussion with me.

I don't want to say anymore because I don't want to reveal any personal information.

So today I am not having a visit with my friend. I thought that instead, I would work on de-stashing and also plan something new to knit or crochet. For now, I will have a cup of coffee and try to make sense of the jumble of emails I get from various knitting and crochet groups I joined!

friends today

Today I didn't hardly get anything done, but I sure had fun. A friend came over and visited with her little girl who is 3 1/2 years old. My daughter was totally overjoyed to be able to play with another little girl. They were laughing and squeeling and just having a ball. It was fun to see. I had to do the mommy thing and film a little of it.

I managed to put a couple more rows on a tunisian crochet "thing" I am making. I'm not sure what it will be, but it might have to be a bag since I'm running out of yarn and can't make a changing table mat (for a baby).

Tonight, I need to go put all my daughter's toys away. I stacked all her new toys (from her birthday and Christmas) on top of the bed to get them out of the way. And I'm going to sort through her old toys and bag up a bunch to either donate or put in storage. I wish we had more room but we don't. So we'll have to be ruthless at times and just donate a bunch of stuff.

My yarn stash is next. I hope that we will be able to make a donation this weekend. Oh that reminds me. I need to do 2 things: call my husband tonight and ask him to bring cardboard boxes home from work. They have the best boxes for packing up stuff. And I also need to make a note to myself that I must call the pediatrician tomorrow to confirm that I can drop in on Monday for my kiddo to get some shots. I also need to pack up a box for my friend because I am going to pass along some of my daughter's baby clothes (my friend is expecting and is receptive to second hands). Of course I'll enclose something new. I crocheted a really cute baby hat that matches a shirt I bought for the lil' boy.

Oh the joys of having a personal blog! The weather was really nice today. Cool and crisp; no rain; sunny. I am watching the first episode of "Keeping Up Appearances" (I have the DVD set). And today my husband was extremely wonderful to me. I can't think of anything else to record here. It was just a nice pleasant day. Although I did receive sad news about a friend of mine having a medical emergency. I'm praying for her and it has cast a sad tone on the day. I feel the precariousness of life today. I also received a phone call from another friend and learned of an old acquaintance having a myspace page. So I was able to read what he is up to and look at his current pics. It was really strange to look in on his life via a myspace page. I haven't seen him in more than a decade. He looks really old to me. But then again, I look old now too, I guess. But he does look like life has kicked him around a bit. I'm sure he's just been working really hard because he's a Phd student. I assume that would age you a bit! He has a super cute baby. It seems like a lot of people my age (mid to late thirties) are having babies now.

knitting, old projects, new plans, knitlist ring

I've been joining some online knitting and crocheting groups. I thought it might give me a little push towards growing and learning more techniques. I really want to make something substantial soon. Usually I make scarves or small items and give them away as gifts. This past Christmas, I knitted a really beautiful shawl (The Comfort Shawl) and 2 pairs of fingerless gloves (Dashing). Those projects gave me a taste for pushing my comfort level (the shawl took a long time to knit and the gloves required DPN's which are awkward to use). Right now, I'm browsing through crochet and knitting books that I bought for myself for Christmas. I feel really inspired. But now I have to make a decision and commit to one project!

I'm also gathering up all my old yarn and knit/crochet notions. I'm going to be ruthless and get rid of a fair amount of yarn. Then I will organize my notions better so that I can actually find the right item when I need it. My husband has been really pleased with the organizing I've done so far. I made a lot of progress on the mess in the bedroom. I think he'll respect my decision to get rid of some of my precious yarn (not-so-precious, actually!)

I'm going to join the knitlist ring! I hope I can figure out how to install the ring navigation button. I have a flickr account but I'm not sure if that's gonna work?

Color issues, cotton yarns, and mason*dixon knitting, language delays

I always seem to have issues with color. Specifically, I can't seem to figure out what colors I like, and whenever I want to make something, I never seem to have the right color for that particular item in my stash. I also am a flagrant cheapskate when it comes to yarn. I am seriously considering giving up cheap yarns. I might just gather up all my current (cheap) stash and either donate it or throw it away. Then I would commit myself to buying only nice yarn, and only for specific projects. That way, I would not have a constant problem with storing all the yarn. My husband would be happier. I would be happier (with prettier yarn and prettier results). The question is: Can I content myself with having less yarn? And buying yarn less frequently too. Because I couldn't buy nice yarn at the local craft stores. I would have to order it online or visit one of the smaller snooty yarn stores. And my husband would get all stressed out if he saw how much the "nice" yarn costs. I guess I would have to content myself with buying yarn a few times a year via web sites such as knitpicks. But this is an interesting plan. I feel that it would spur me forward to a higher level of knitting, where I would be more thoughtful about what I was making and would learn some new techniques. It's just too easy, when using cheap yarn, to knit how I call, "mindless knitting". I like mindless knitting for the soothing effects. But I don't like having all these ugly projects (that I end up shoving in a drawer) and trashbags full of cheap yarn.

About color: I noticed today that I really like teal. And that's odd because I always strongly disliked teal. I was trying to remember why I dislike teal (maybe it reminds me of the 80's?) But I think it has some merit as a good strong color in the blue family without being as boring as most blue shades.

Last night, I bought the book "Mason*Dixon Knitting". I really like it, although in some ways it seems like an expensive book with not enough patterns or useful content. There is a lot of chit chat in it. But the patterns are kinda interesting. It makes me want to try something new, such as mitered squares or knitting some windowshades or pillows. I haven't made things like that. So for me, it's a good book to encourage me to move forward. For some people, I imagine the book is too basic and easy because they have already done all that stuff.

I read some of the comments on the book's amazon page, and it seems like people really like the book. You can knit warsh rags with it, but you can also make the baby kimono and a baby bib. I admit it: I plan to use my stash of sugar and cream to make the warshrags! But now I have lost my innocence with the knowledge that there is actually a difference between Sugar 'n Cream (by Lily) and Peaches and Creme (by Elmore-Pisgah). I'll never be the same again. Now I have to decide whether to drive to Pasadena to the only yarn store in my area that carries Peaches and Creme. Or I must resolve to order it online. Or I will cave in to convenience and satisfy myself with a slightly less soft Sugar 'n Cream cotton yarn. Why did I have to learn of this?

Oh well. I think it would not matter what to use when making a warshrag or baby bib. And maybe I could buy nicer worsted weight cotton for the baby kimono because that's going to be worn against the skin.

Recently I learned that my daughter is having some language delays. She's 2 years old and is not asking for things such as "want cookie" (or whatever...that's what the pediatrician said when explaining the issue to me). So now she has to go to a speech pathologist just to make sure there's nothing wrong. But anyhow, I mention it because I have just learned that I have to spend less time knitting and crocheting and more time teaching and interacting with my daughter. I have enjoyed, during the past few months, taking some time out just for me. My daughter is pretty content to play with her toys for periods of time, as she has become an older baby/toddler. So I have enjoyed having a little time for myself. But I am going to have to be strong and just steal shorter periods of times to knit/crochet a little during the day. When my daughter naps or goes to bed, I can get my knit on. But it's a little frustrating because I received so many inspiring books for Christmas and I totally want to crochet and knit my brains out. Also, my brother and his wife are expecting their first child and I have some really cool plans for that. But I will have to just plan my time well and work an hour or two a day in the evenings when my daughter is asleep.

Such is life. I love my daughter and if she needs to get some extra encouragement during this time, then I will do it happilly. I'm planning to get her out to play with other little kids more, and also to do some crafts and more reading time at home. I want to make home-made playdough soon. My friend has a good recipe for it. I'm going to use Wilton cake colors (gel dye) to color it because I hear you can get some wonderful colors of playdough that way.

New Year, No Hooks!

New Year's Eve and New Year's Day were spent visiting my family. It was great! What a lovely time we had. But I made a terrible mistake when I left to go home: I forgot my crafting bag which has all my crochet hooks and most of my knitting needles in it!!! What a ghastly thing to do. Because I now find myself in the new year, all jittery from lack of crocheting and knitting. Yesterday, I found myself wandering from room to room, mindlessly looking for something to work on. I found a Tunisian crochet hook and some old Red Heart Supersaver yarn in a garish teal color. So now I am doing a simple afghan stitch panel. I was not sure what I was making. It was just a big swatch of plain afghan stitch. But then I had a moment of inspiration. I remembered that you can cross-stitch on tunisian afghan stitch! So now I am going to find some goofy cross-stitch charts, such as for mushrooms and squirrels or something weird like that. Then I'll decorate the fabric. And I guess then I have to decide whether I am brave enough to send it to my friend who is having a baby. I was thinking I might tell her that it's a changing pad for when you want to change your baby when visiting someone (and you don't want your baby to pee on their sofa, or whatever surface you are laying the babe on.)



So much fun. I love making stuff!!! So this is my new blog for recording my zany ideas. I am calling it humble threads because I usually work with inexpensive yarn and make simple stuff.